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Temporary Fixes for Permanent Problems
I got lost in myself and wandered off my path
Mom did her best to give my sisters and me a good life, but she was married to a cruel, overbearing man who cheated on her and demoralized her. She didn’t think she could make it without him, but I was convinced otherwise, so I begged her to put us all out of our misery and kick him out. When she finally agreed, we packed his belongings together and put them outside.
I sensed that I probably was stepping out of my lane a bit, but that was par for the course with me. I was the oldest child, and I’d always had a lot of responsibility around the house. The combination of my dad’s mean-spirited attitude toward us and my mom’s shrinking confidence created a parenting void that I tried to fill.
Something had to give
After Dad left, my grandparents moved in with us. I loved them more than anything, and I had no problem caring for them as their health worsened, but their presence added a layer of complexity to our lives. My depression, which I’d had since I could remember (even if I didn’t know what to call it back then), intensified as my obligations grew and my support system faltered.
Moving from eighth grade into high school added to my stress, especially since I attended an advanced school…
